Opinion Piece: Rethinking Stalking Prevention – A Call for Compassionate and Effective Change
Alt Text: "A conceptual image of a snake shedding its skin, reflecting themes of transformation and restorative justice in stalking prevention."
For too long, stalking prevention measures have focused on reactive, punitive solutions that fail both victims and perpetrators. As someone who has lived on both sides of the stalking dynamic, first as a victim and later as a perpetrator during a period of psychosis, I’ve experienced firsthand how deeply flawed our current systems are. I believe it’s time to rethink how we address stalking—to create a framework that prioritizes proactive intervention, rehabilitation, and restorative justice.
The Problem with Existing Measures
Traditional stalking prevention strategies often place an enormous burden on the victim while demonizing the perpetrator. Victims are expected to maintain constant vigilance, document every interaction, and navigate a legal system that frequently gaslights and retraumatizes them. As someone who has reported stalking incidents in the past, I’ve felt the sting of institutional failure. The lack of understanding from police and courts left me with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and a lingering distrust of the very systems meant to protect me.
Meanwhile, perpetrators are painted as irredeemable villains, with little effort made to understand or address the underlying behaviors driving their actions. Punitive measures like restraining orders or jail time may provide temporary relief for victims, but they rarely result in meaningful change for the perpetrator. This approach does little to prevent future stalking and often escalates the conflict.
A Proactive, Restorative Approach
We need a paradigm shift in stalking prevention—one that acknowledges the humanity of both victims and perpetrators. Instead of perpetuating cycles of fear, shame, and punishment, we should focus on solutions that:
Empower Victims Without Burdening Them: Victims deserve reassurance and safety without bearing the sole responsibility for managing the situation. This includes better access to trauma-informed support, streamlined legal processes, and community-based interventions that prioritize their well-being.
Address the Perpetrator’s Needs: Many stalking behaviors stem from mental health struggles, unresolved trauma, or maladaptive attachment patterns. Engaging perpetrators in reflective activities, therapy, and accountability programs can help them understand and change their behavior. By addressing these root causes, we can reduce recidivism and promote lasting change.
Incorporate Restorative Justice Principles: Restorative justice provides a path for healing by allowing victims to express their experiences and perpetrators to take responsibility for their actions. In safe and appropriate contexts, mediated dialogues can foster understanding and closure for both parties.
My Advocacy Journey
As someone who transformed my experience of being both a stalking victim and perpetrator into a commitment to advocacy, I’ve learned the importance of empathy and accountability. I now work to create engaging activities and reflection exercises aimed at addressing the needs of perpetrators while reassuring victims. These tools encourage self-awareness, emotional regulation, and healthier relational patterns, offering a proactive alternative to traditional punitive measures.
For example, one activity I developed, “The Enclosure,” uses creative writing, movement, and visualization to help individuals explore their boundaries and the impact of their actions on others. By fostering introspection and growth, exercises like this can help prevent harmful behaviors before they escalate.
A Call to Action
It’s time for stalking awareness advocacy groups to champion a new approach—one that prioritizes prevention, compassion, and long-term solutions. We need to shift the narrative around stalking from one of villainy and victimization to one of accountability and healing. By addressing the root causes of stalking and supporting both victims and perpetrators, we can create a safer and more just society.
I invite advocacy groups, mental health professionals, and restorative justice practitioners to join me in this effort. Together, we can develop programs and policies that truly prevent stalking, protect victims, and provide perpetrators with the tools they need to change.
Closing Thoughts
Stalking is a complex issue that demands nuanced solutions. While the current system may offer short-term fixes, it fails to address the deeper dynamics at play. By reimagining our approach to stalking prevention, we can move beyond the limitations of punishment and create pathways for genuine change. Let’s work together to build a future where safety and accountability go hand in hand.
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